Lost and Found

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It’s happened again. I’ve fallen behind. Ridiculously behind. I visited my wonderful friend, Kristina, in Serbia, my beloved old roomie, Alex, in Germany, volunteered on a farm with a fabulous family in Ireland, and traveled half way around the world back to Minnesota [Surprise! I’m home for those of you who didn’t know!], and yet, I wrote about none of it. Sorry. I’ve been home for over a week, have remained unemployed, rarely left the house, and still haven’t updated the world wide web… Whoops. Remember when I used to have exciting excuses for not writing? Like being on a midnight train to Austria? Or prancing around Eastern Europe with my friend Victoria? These days, I’ve been avoiding writing for much less thrilling and much more depressing reasons – most notably, depression. Reverse culture shock, an overwhelming excess of free time, and the realization that I currently have no excuse to flee American society have brought me down. I’m jazzed about being back with my family and friends, but readjusting is taking some time. Please bare with me and my over dramatic writing. I’m making things out to be much worse than they really are. I’ll settle back in soon enough, I’m sure.

I’ve thought about writing everyday since I’ve been home, but I’ve had a hard time wrapping my head around it. It almost feels like if I write this post, it will officially be over. No more flights. No new countries. Friends scattered. Pictures uploaded. French bank account closed. Calls being directed towards an American phone. My blog is the last bit of the year that remains. I realize how silly it sounds, but that’s where I’m at right now. Instead of letting these things continue to drag me down, though, I decided it was time to write one last post to get my shit together, stop being a whiney pants, process my thoughts, and reflect on the year. I need to stop complaining about it being over, and start smiling because it happened. I also couldn’t just leave my faithful followers (all 16 of you) hanging like that! So here are some lists of things lost, found, learned, etc. to sum things up a bit, because who doesn’t love some youthful half-baked wisdom in list form?

Things realized/learned:

• Paris is the best. Really. I know it’s lame and cliché, but: Paris, je t’aime. Even after visiting Austria, Italy, Poland, The Czech Republic, Hungary, Serbia, Germany and Ireland, each with numerous amazing cities, Paris still remains at the top of my list. No matter how many times I’ve been there, I always find something new to see or do. It has a beauty, a vibrance, and an ambiance that has yet to be matched in my eyes.
• I’m an introvert at heart. Most of you are probably thinking, “Um… duh?” while others might be surprised. It probably depends on how long you’ve known me. My desire to be liked can bring out my sociable side making me seem outgoing and extroverted at first glance, but I’ve realized this year that I’m much more comfortable in small groups. I love interacting with people, but I’m also content spending time alone. Some long talks with Victoria helped me come around to accepting this about myself.
• Everything is bigger in America. I’ve always known this, but everything has been magnified after being away for so long. Cars. Roads. Houses. Food. Washing machines. Water glasses [pointed out by Kate]. People. The size doesn’t really bother me as much as the waste. If you want to indulge every once in awhile, great, but be aware of your consumption. I don’t want to get all preachy and tell everyone off for killing the world, but I’m pretty sick of our consumer-centric society right now.
• Meat is not for me. I broke my four and a half year streak of vegetarianism a handful of times during my travels, but I’ve decided that being meat-free wasn’t just a weird phase I went through in college. It’s something that I want to continue to live by, and I hope to encourage others to join me! It can be a little tricky in certain situations, but I feel both physically and ethically better without mammals in my body.
• Too much free time is just as bad as not having enough. I constantly used to wish for a day off when I was at Olaf, swamped with eight classes a semester, papers, exams, rehearsals, social obligations, etc., etc., but after seven months of 12 (often 7 or 8) hour work weeks and ridiculously long (and frequent) vacations, I long for the opposite. It seems to be a “grass is greener” situation. I want to be busy! Well, I want to be balanced. I work well with a lot on my plate, but not an overflowing buffet of stress. Something to work on.
• Kids are cool. Spending time with Monique’s granddaughter (5 year old Hélena), and the two little ones on the farm in Ireland (4 year old Archer and 1.5 year old Tallulah) made me realize how much I love children. The way they think and act without all of the weird social hang ups that adults have is fantastic. Not that it’s going to happen anywhere in my near future, but hanging out with these kids made me realize that maaaybe one day I’ll want to adopt my own. Maybe.
• How to ask for help. I’ve always been a very proud person, trying to do find my own way or do things without the help of others, but I realized how much easier things can be if you simply ask for directions or a helping hand. People will sometimes surprise you and offer up help even when you don’t ask for it, and it is wonderful! Like the man who saw Victoria and me looking confused in Budapest and quickly ran up to help us find our way. Or the man in Ireland who pulled over and informed me that I was trying to hitch a ride on the wrong road.
• Genuinely good people do exist. I’ve met some. American assistants, couchsurfing hosts, French friends, Irish hitchhiker hosts, just to name a few. I have some faith in humanity.

Things lost:

• Some of my obnoxious inhibitions. Like my fear of talking on the phone. I realize most people got over this when they were six, but it took me a bit longer. After making numerous calls in French this year, talking on the phone in English now seems like such a breeze. I’m even learning to enjoy it. Weird. Explaining how I want my haircut? Did it in French, no problemo. Communication skills are up!
• My yearning for approval. As much as I hate to admit it, for a large part of my life I always sought the approval of those around me, often compromising my thoughts or opinions to remain neutral and liked by everyone. I still try to be diplomatic, but I’m tired of trying to please everyone. It’s exhausting to try and make everyone like you all the time, and quite frankly, there are some people’s opinions that I could care less about. I’m happy with who I am, and my thoughts are just as good as anyone else’s. As Dr. Seuss once said,“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.”
• 35 pounds. How this happened, I have absolutely no idea. Ask anyone who was with me, and they will tell you that I was constantly eating my entire body weight in local cuisine and cookies. I guess walking everywhere (including to the grocery store) and not having access to an insane buffet spread everyday will have an effect on your waistline.
• Hair. Some voluntarily via trendy euro haircut, some reluctantly via male pattern baldness. With bad hair genes running rampant on both sides of my family, I’ve been fearing hair loss since I hit puberty so this is by no means a shocking upset. I’ve always cherished my hair as one of my more attractive features, so it’s been rather disheartening to see how thin my bangs have become, but I’m dealing with it and enjoying my hair while it’s still around. Anyone know of any good natural hair loss prevention techniques?
• 15+ kilos of clothing. I realized at the end of the year that I owned way too many things that I just never wore, so I donated the equivalent of an entire suitcase of clothing. My luggage was of course still super heavy, but it felt good to clear out some of the excess. I managed with one 9 kilo backpack from May 5th to June 8th, so what the heck have I been doing with all of this other stuff my whole life? Traveling light is the way to go. I’m continuing the excess purge by donating yet another giant bag of unworn clothes that I found in my bedroom this week.
• A desire to teach. Teaching isn’t really my jam. At least not with French high school kids. I had some good times with my kids, but the fun tended to be a little over shadowed by the anxiety and stress of planning lessons. I haven’t entirely dismissed education as a job option, but it’s not at the top of my career aspirations list.

Things found:

• A voice through writing. I’m not always the best for engaging conversation topics or the most articulate in front of a crowded room, but I think I’m pretty decent with a pen and paper (or a screen and keyboard if you will). Writing gives me time to reflect and plan out my word choice just so to properly express myself. It can be a little meticulous and frustrating at times, but I’m so happy I took the time to write down my thoughts throughout the year. I hope my writing has helped my readers to gain a better understanding of me and the way I think. People seem to dig it, and I dig doing it, so maybe the writing will continue!
• Confidence. See [Lost:] “Some of my inhibitions” and “My yearning for approval” above.
• Friends. This was obviously inevitable, but I didn’t realize how meaningful some of my relationships abroad would end up being to me. The first time I met all of the other assistants at our teacher orientation, I was a total B and thought I would never get along with anyone. I couldn’t have been more wrong. I met some absolutely fabulous people in Saint-Brieuc, and looking back I can’t imagine my year without them.
• Food. I’ve learned some delicious recipes and cooking tips over the past 8 months, and I want to share them with all of you! So come get in the kitchen with me and we’ll make something together! Maybe I’ll even start a food blog. Or become a pastry chef. Thoughts?
• A beard. See: flickr account.
• Frequent flyer miles. Just kidding. If only Ryanair and SNCF had miles programs. And existed in the states. I would be all up on that.
• An immense respect for teachers. I’ve always regarded teaching as a noble profession, but after planning lessons and standing in front of a group of hormonal, self-absorbed, uninterested teenagers, I see teachers in an entirely different light. Good luck to all of my friends who are pursuing k-12 education, and thank you to everyone who put up with my (and mostly my fellow classmates’) teenage antics.
• Myself. See: all of the above. I’m constantly learning more about myself and realizing how much I am always changing, but being away helped me gain a sense of self-awareness that I never had before.

Things I miss about France/Europe:

• Sounds. Sights. Smells. Tastes. Being surrounded by Francophones. Charlie’s meow. Church bells marking the hour. The odd tritone used for emergency vehicle alarms. Market days. Galettes. Café terraces with 1€ espressos. Intricate architecture. Monuments all over the place. Striking landscapes. The sea. Bakeries. The cheese aisle at U Express. Our sunny yellow kitchen. Rainy/sunny/rainy/sunny/rainy days and the rainbows and sunsets they produce. Cheap wine that doesn’t taste like vinegar. Salted butter.
• Fresh baguettes. There is an amazing bakery on every street in France. There is approximately one amazing bakery per State. One of my life goals is to perfect the baking of une baguette de tradition. Once you’ve eaten french bread, there’s no going back.
• Public transport. The facility of navigating European cities puts metro transit to shame. Cars aren’t obligatory like they are stateside, partially because everything is much closer, but mostly because bus, train and metro systems are so much more efficient over seas! Also, I am a terrible driver highly dislike driving, so I’m all about public transport.  It makes so much more sense both economically and ecologically to share rides, but America can’t seem to get behind that. I’ll never understand why not.
• Global mentality and open minds.  In comparison with the French, Americans are incredibly self-centered and close-minded. I’m making a sweeping generalization here, obviously, but on the whole it seems to be true. We rarely focus on world news, and half of us couldn’t tell the difference between Iraq and Iran. Conservative Republicans don’t exist en masse and people are always fighting for change. I have some faith left in the progressive minds of my generation, especially in places like Minnesota, but other parts of the country worry me a bit. As long as Mitt Romney stays out of the white house, I think I’ll be okay.

Things I will be fine without:

• Restrictive hours. While I understand and respect the French ideal of giving store owners time to rest, everything closing at 7:30pm and ceasing to exist at all on Sundays did get rather annoying at times. Like 8:30pm on a Friday night and you realize you’ve run out of booze milk and can’t make macaroni and cheese. 24/7 supermarkets are a little insane, but they can be quite nice to have around every once in a while.
• Elderly roommates. Don’t get me wrong, I love René from the bottom of my heart and I am eternally grateful for everything he has done for me, but sometimes living with an obsessive compulsive 70 year old Frenchman was a little frustrating. He is an amazing person, but twenty-somethings and seventy-somethings don’t always see eye to eye. If I had to do it all over again, I would definitely still chose to live at 9 rue Chateaubriand, but I’m not planning on rooming with any other senior citizens in the near future.
• Smoke. I’ve never been one to hate on smokers, but oh my gawd do Europeans know how to suck down a pack of cigarettes. I’m all about letting people do what they want, but it’s nice to be back in a place where you have to step outside to take a puff.
• French t.v./radio. It’s awful. They tend to take all of the bad parts of American television and music and leave out all of the good parts. It’s amazing how few true French t.v. shows, movies and musicians actually exist.

I’m sure there are other things I should/could/would like to add to these lists, but my brain is feeling drained. I’ve been working on these lists on and off for nearly 12 hours now, and I can think no more. The lists may change slightly over the next few days if anything else pops into my head, but that’s all she wrote for now. Thanks for reading y’all. It’s been real. A million and one bisous to everyone who’s kept up with my European exploits over the past eight months, and a million and one bisous even to those who haven’t. I love you all to Europe and back.

xoxoxo Stephen

Disparate Youth

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Remember that time I had a blog? I do. Do you? I wouldn’t be surprised if you happened to forget about it over my past three and a half week absence. It’s not necessarily that I haven’t had the time to write, but more that the thought of writing has become incredibly overwhelming each day I don’t write. There were so many stories and adventures to share from my Eastern European adventure with Victoria that I didn’t even know where to start! Since we got back two Saturdays ago, I’ve had the best intentions of writing, but there has just been crazy amounts of activities and so much planning an preparation going on leaving me no time to sit down and blabber on about my life. The days pass by quickly, and the sun in Bretagne is insanely deceptive. Sunset has been consistently holding out until 9:30 or later over the past month or so which has continued to blow my mind and throw me completely off balance.

Anyway, in a pathetic and lazy attempt to assuage any resentment you may have towards me for not writing about Poland, the Czech Republic, and Hungary, I’m providing you with the following cinematic masterpieces: video updates that Victoria recorded during our trip! To be perfectly honest with you, I haven’t actually watched them since I despise the sound of my own voice, but from what I remember of recording them, they’re a pretty decent (and mildly comedic?) recap of what we did. Please enjoy and accept them as the best I can do right now. Also, there are PLENTY of pictures on facebook! (I’ll try and post some on here later for anyone who happens to not be my fb-friend)

Jumpin around Euroland!

In other news, Kate has come to visit me! I’ve been kind of a booger of a host since I’ve been stressed with planning the rest of my trips/figure out my life… For example, I’m writing on my blog right now instead of spending time with her. I’m the worst, and I know it. We’ve been doing our best to have a good time though! Listening to k-pop, watching 90s movies, eating lots of delicious foods. We’re also going to try and get out a little the rest of the week, seeing some more typically “Bretagne” things like Ile-de-Bréhat and Rennes (to also conveniently return my cello). We’ll see what happens.

Also, my travel plans are almost finalized! Thank the lawd. I’ve been a giant ball of stress trying to figure it all out. My rough plan is as follows:

• May 5th to the 8th: Paris
• May 8th to the 10th: Budapest (again!)
• May 10th to 15th: Belgrade with my lovely friend Kristina!
• May 15th to 21st: Germany (cities TBD) to visit my roomie Alex!
• May 21st to June 6th: WWOOFing in Ireland (city/farm TBD)
• June 6th to June 8th: Paris
• June 8th: MINNEAPOLIS! Yes! My trip home has finally been planned!

I’m excited for all of these things, but already a little tired out just thinking about it all. Part of me is jealous of the other assistants who are already heading home this week, but I know I would regret not taking advantage of my time left in Europe. It’s going to be great, and coming home will surely be oh so lovely after my last month away.

How Stephen Got His Groove Back

Well shit. Looks like another month has come and gone without much notice, and without much commentary on my behalf. I’d like to say that I barely wrote anything during the second half of January because I was out and about, busy beyond belief without a second to spare and never on the internet, but that would be a blatant lie. The truth is quite the opposite to be perfectly honest. As I mentioned before, I had gotten myself into a bit of a mid-year slump after the holidays, and though I tried to pull myself out of it as quickly as possible, these things take some time. Cooking and baking and blogging have all been helpful tools, but being stuck in Saint-Brieuc for the the entire month of January was a bit of a road block. When I wasn’t preoccupied with the oven, I found myself in my room watching things like Downton Abbey (which, by the way, is an amazing show that I highly recommend watching if you haven’t yet) and eating more than my fair share of desserts. I was far from being clinically depressed, but was still highly unmotivated thanks to a bout cold weather, the unglamorous ‘city’ of Saint-Brieuc, and an ever impending sense of doom looming over my undecided future. Dramatic much? Oui.

Luckily, February has thus far been a breath of fresh air and the rest of the month is full of promise. Out of nowhere, there seems to be so much to do and see! Being too busy to write has become a legitimate excuse over the past week, and the fun of February isn’t even half over! With a road trip to Normandy and a pseudo-weekend in Rennes already under my belt, I still have a week long trip to Picardie followed by an Italian tour to look forward to! My mind has been a little all over the place lately trying to keep the travel plans straight for all four of these trips, but it’s kept me busy and anxious in an excited way. Places to go! People to see! Much better than brooding in my bed. Who ever would’ve thought February could be so grand?

As I headed out to Normandy this past weekend in a nine person “mini-bus” with my Franco-American crew, I couldn’t help but recall another voyage made not so long ago. Last January during interim break, I headed South with my friends Sarah, Clara, Ann, and Laurel for an Arkansan adventure that I’ll never forget. The week we spent in Conway was by far one of the most hilarious and enjoyable times of my conscious life, both extremely exciting and incredibly relaxing. Being in warm weather, going on mountainous walks, singing show tunes at the dinner table, drinking $1.99 margarita’s at JJ’s, giving into/falling in love with country music, cave diving, curling up on couches, learning about places like Pickle’s Gap and Toad Suck, baking buttloads of cookies and decorating a staggering number of Valentine’s Day cards made for a welcome recess from freezing/studying our asses off at Olaf. Breaking routine, visiting somewhere new, and being surrounded by wonderful people gave everything a new light. There was a sense of comfort and openness with my friends after being together day and night for the entirety of break. It’s so easy to get caught up in the stresses of life, but weeks like that help you notice how happy things can be when you let go and have some uninhibited fun. #clichécentralbutwhateveritstrue #ewijustusedahashtag

The beginning of something beautiful

happy beings behind falsely angry façades

hot potatoes make the world go round and cause awkward photographic reactions

The MOST Valentine's Arkansas has ever seen

The weekend at my friend Leslie’s in Normandy essentially served the same revitalizing purpose as the week in Arkansas but in a much more urgently-needed and heightened sense. Getting the heck out of St-B. and letting things loose in the country shook things up and made me giddy. Making homemade pizza in a giant brick oven, sipping on cidre and wine, cuddling with an adorable dog, seeing the tragically beautiful beaches of Normandy, visiting the epic tapestry of Bayeux, gathering around a raclette, wandering around the countryside, playing charades and trivial pursuit, watching the Superbowl (for the sake of Madonna), getting snowed-in and missing a full day of work (snow days do still exist!), and marveling at Le Mont Saint-Michel made for a memorable weekend that has given me a firm shove out of my previous slump status. My life is nuts, in a good way. I’m sending out a MILLION thanks to Leslie and Allie for making this weekend happen! You two are the bomb.

Kate presenting Leslie's cozy little home

HOMEMADE PIZZA

Raclette Dinner chez Leslie

Le Mont St-Michel

Even though the characters and settings of my life continue to change, there are certain things that remain true:

• traveling with someone is one of the best ways to really get to know them
• cold weather is relative
• snow days are always the best days
• road trips are always the best trips
• food brings people together, namely potatoes
• charades requires more skill than you think
• sleeping between two people is starts out as a wonderful idea until you become a fiery hot mess
• 90s jams alway make the perfect car ride soundtrack

My upgraded emotional status stuck with me throughout this week as more classes were canceled (making this a four-day-work-MONTH) and as I headed to Rennes on Tuesday afternoon for a mid-week weekend. Our last-minute-guest-conductor-turned-new-found-friend from last year’s orchestra tour, Tito Munoz, was in town directing Bejamin Britten’s opera,  The Turn of the Screw. I got to see the show with my resident Rennes friends (Mary Claire, Berit, and most recently relocated Steph!), and got a chance to hang out/catch up with Tito after the show which was great! Talking about last year’s tour made me freshly miss orchestra, but there was a welcomed sense of nostalgia and plenty of other things to talk about to keep us from focusing too heavily on the past. My days off gave me plenty of time to get in some good one-on-one time with Steph and Berit as well, nicely rounding off my time in Rennes.

So that’s more or less where my life is at. There’s still plenty to worry about (and a mouthful of canker sores to prove it), with my sister out of commission thanks to her gallbladder, open-ended travel plans, unplanned lessons to teach, and my future continuing to be 100% uncertain, but present life is pretty good with trips on either side of me. My chin is up, and I’m ready for more fun. Come and join my party! Catch ya on the other side of Italy!

Bisous bisous xoxo

[Fr]anksgiving

Over the past few days, there have been a number of things that I’ve wanted to write about, but just haven’t seemed to have enough focus or alone time to do so until today. So my apologies in advance if this post ends up being a little disjointed!

First major point: Thanksgiving! Since none of us will be in the States for this most American of American holidays, the other English assistants and I organized a giant Thanksgiving dinner for this past Saturday afternoon/evening chez moi. What started out as a simple guest list of only assistants soon morphed into a monstrous list of 21 in order to accommodate our surprisingly large make-shift French “family.” Seeing the finalized list made me both extremely happy and rather stressed out all at once. It was amazing to realize how many wonderful people I’ve already met in such a short amount of time, but the thought of playing host for such a large group also caused me to panic a bit. I was by no means putting this dinner on by myself, but since it was happening at my house I felt greatly responsible for how things went. I’m a generally anxious person, and my anxiety definitely took over for good chunk of the afternoon.

As a child of Polish decent, my main concern was that there wasn’t going to be enough to feed everyone. I come from a family where food is of utmost importance, always delicious and above all else, abundant. If there isn’t enough for at least 3 servings per person, there is a problem. Everyone was bringing a dish to share, but would it be enough with the extended guest list?! Would all 21 stomachs be filled?! How was everything going to be cooked in our tiny little toaster oven?!? Did we remember to cover all of the classic Thanksgiving dishes?!?!?

Turns out, my fears were completely unwarranted. With a 15lb turkey, three pots of mashed potatoes, two giant casserole dishes of stuffing, plenty of butternut squash, green beans, German potato salad, French onion soup, baguettes, cranberry jello, green salad, twelve bottles of wine, and three pies (apple crumble, pecan, and pumpkin), there was more than enough to go around. So much, in fact, that we had enough leftovers for everyone to come over for a SECOND ROUND on Sunday afternoon! We just left the tables as they were, set out new plates, and let everyone dig in. Preeeeetty ridiculous.

The other point of stress was due to a miscommunication of timing and an abundance of tardiness, à la française. I missed the original planning session amongst assistants last week, so my main source of information about the plans was a mostly-legible picture posted on facebook. The only time mentioned in the picture of the planning sheet was 16h (aka 4pm), and I unfortunately made the assumption that was meal time. I then spread the word to some others not involved in the planning that we would be eating around 4, when in reality, the plan was to merely get together at 4 and eat much later around 7 or so. This led to everyone arriving at all sorts of different times, food being cooked and served little by little, and a minor sense of chaos between the first arrival at 3:45 and the last around 6:30. A little hectic, but mostly hilarious in the end.

After we managed to round everyone up and get everything on the table, things finally settled down. Looking up and down the ridiculously long table at a room full of happy faces washed away all of my stress and anxiety, and made the whole crazy day worthwhile. The joy and warmth in the room was overwhelming, and I felt incredibly thankful for everyone in my life and this new home away from home.

After stuffing myself to the brim, I sat at the table listening to Christmas music and feeling a little dazed. As my thoughts turned to family, friends, and Thanksgiving at home, my happiness started to lose it’s glow. I’ve been missing people and things about home since the day I left, but it really seemed to hit me hardest on Saturday. Two months away is barely a challenge, but the thought of not being able to spend the holidays at home is a tougher pill to swallow. In my 22 years, I have yet to spend a single Thanksgiving or Christmas without my family, and it’s strange to think that this will be the first. I know that I’ll be home before I know it, missing all people and things French, but I still can’t help but feel sad about the upcoming holiday season. Love and miss you all much!

That’s one of the awful, yet beautiful things about living internationally – no matter where you are, there is always someone you miss. I’m thankful for that. Even if it’s hard sometimes, it’s comforting to know that there are so many great people in my life, even if we aren’t always in the same place.

My next point on a somewhat related note: My failed attempt to teach French high school students about Thanksgiving. First of all, my kids this week were suuuuuuuuuuuuper unmotivated to learn about one of the best holidays! I was like, listen, it is a holiday where all you do is eat and hang out with your fam – what’s not to love?!? I guess it would be pretty hard to understand if you’ve never experienced it, but they could at least show a little more interest!

When I asked what they already knew about Thanksgiving, their knowledge and understanding of Thanksgiving was limited to, “You eat turkey!” and, “I see Thanksgiving on Gossip Girl,” so they should’ve been ready to learn, right? Guess not. My first class was a particularly frustrating group of 15 girls. They wouldn’t stop talking to each other, and I had my first ever case of teacher outrage. I stopped talking about mashed potatoes, raised my voice, and told the girls “If you’re not talking to ME, don’t talk AT ALL!” It was like a strange out of body experience. I was like, uh, whoa, did I really just do that? Yeah. I did. Sooooooooo weird, but I really didn’t know what else to do that the time. It’s incredibly difficult to be in this weird middle ground between student and teacher, riding on a fine line between wanting both friendship and respect from the students. Some of the groups are SO wonderful and I feel at ease talking with them, but I’m still working on finding the balance with some of the others.

After going over all of the Thanksgiving basics of history, food, and traditions, I tried to get everyone to tell me something they were thankful for. This proved to be an unexpected challenge. They all looked at me with terrified eyes like I was asking them to recite the U.S. constitution or give me their left kidney. Apparently some of them are ungrateful little brats, because the most common response was, “Nossing?” [aka Nothing]. Either that or I failed at explaining what thankful meant. My favorite response from all of my classes by far was, “I thankful weed.” Real winner. That kid is going places.

Final point to be made in this post: Even though the world population has exceeded 7 billion people, the world is still small. Seriously. Yesterday, after my second class, a girl came up to talk to me with some crazy news…

Student: “You come from St. Paul, right?”
Me: “Yeah! My family lives in a suburb of St. Paul!”
Student: “Do you know North St. Paul?”
Me: “YES! That’s where I went to high school!”
Student: “You mean like, with the North High Polars, and the big snowman?”
Me: “Uh… Yes?!? How do you know that?!?”
Student: “My friend is spending a year in the United States, and she is going to school there!”

I was FREAAAAAAKING out after she told me this! Of all the places in the vastness of the U.S., this girl from little ol’ Saint-Brieuc, France ended up not only in Minnesota, but in MY HIGH SCHOOL!!!!!!! Like, what are the odds?!?? It is still blowing my mind. This is not like someone from Paris and someone from New York switching places. SAINT-BRIEUC AND NORTH SAINT PAUL. What the HEEEEEECK?!

I’ll leave you with that mind-boggling story to linger until next time. Bisous mes amis! xoxoxo

[Not] Working for the Weekend

So. I came to France to work. Right? Wrong. As it turns out, I came to France to go on a year long vacation. At least that’s how it seems today as I am comfortably sitting half way through my second vacation. Yeah, that’s right, second vacation! France is seriously so in love with vacay time, it is unreal. During the school year, students (and teachers, obvi) have four large breaks, plus a two month long summer, PLUS a number of public holidays. Crazy stuff.

This is technically not a real vacation for most people, merely a three-day weekend to celebrate Armistice (the French version of Veteran’s Day). Since my work schedule only consists of classes on Mondays, Tuesdays, and Fridays, however, having today off means that I was granted a five-day weekend. To make things even better, we literally just finished Fall holidays for All Saints’ Day last week. That means from October 22 through November 14, I will have worked a grand total of four days. Four days in the span of three weeks. What the HECK France!

I mean, I love me some vaycay, but it’s also unnerving to have such an excess of free time on my hands, especially after four years of non-stop stress and activity at St. Olaf. I used to busy nearly every minute of every day with classes, assignments, papers, rehearsals, meetings, social gatherings, etc. My life now consists of more time off watching internet t.v. and sleeping than time spent working. Seriously. My friend, Allie, counted the other day and figured out that we literally have more days off than actual work days. Please don’t hate me. You probably all think I’m crazy for complaining about this. This may be true. But at the same time, it’s hard to appreciate time off when you are engulfed in it. The joy and release of having a free day gets lost when there is nothing stressful to compare it to. Snow days wouldn’t be nearly as enjoyable if you knew they were coming. Christmas wouldn’t be as meaningful if it happened more than once a year. I’m not saying I want to work more, I’m just saying I need to find a more meaningful way to spend my time.

Here are some ways I have spent my time off so far:

Cooking: I have cooked and baked a number of delicious items including mixed vegetable curry, nutella banana muffins, baked macaroni and cheese, apple tarts, and chili. I would share the recipes, but the problem is that I don’t always measure whilst cooking. Side note: As a result of all this cooking, I have become a regular at both the farmer’s market and the grocery store. I’m pretty sure I go shopping for food more often than I go to the high school.

Internet TV: Some shows that I’ve been watching include Modern Family, Parks and Recreation, Glee, and past seasons of America’s Next Top Model. I was also keeping up with Project Runway, but now that the season is over, my friend Victoria and I have picked up the disgusting habit of watching its new spin-off, Project Accessory. If Project Runway were the cocaine of reality tv, Project Accessory would be its dirty cracked out second cousin. Don’t watch it. Please.

Charlie: Remember that cat that I found in my backyard a couple weeks back? He’s been out in our patio literally every single day since then. I’m pretty sure as long as the milk keeps pouring and the petting continues, he’s mine. He apparently lives two houses down, but I think he is here more often than he is there. So. Cute.

Trips around Brittany: As I mentioned in previous posts, I have already been to Rennes, St. Malo, Mont Saint-Michel, and Dinan, but I have also adventured elsewhere in Bretagne! Last weekend, I ventured down to Nantes with my friends Erinn (American) and Claire (French) for a BALLER concert. Laura Marling, James Blake, and Cults (plus this dumpy opening band called La Femme). We met some really awesome people via couchsurfing, and the concert was superb. If you don’t know these artists, get your butt on google and listen to some of their jams. Actually, I’ll just give you a sampling of what you’re missing out on:

This past Wednesday, I also went on a day trip to Perros-Guirec which is on La Côte de Granit Rose (The Pink Granite Coast). It is one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen in my life. The colors of the massive pink-tinted rock formations next to the blues and greens of the sea creates an unbelievable palate. I would post pictures, but alas, I took my 35mm film Pentax along for the trip instead of my digital SLR. Whoops. Grace à google, I can still give you a photo to appease your interests:

Click me!   Or me!

UPDATE: A picture of Alex and me at Perros-Guirec!

Miscellaneous: Things including but not limited to… sleeping, knitting, reading, bike riding, shopping, drinking, writing, dancing, breathing, etc.

All in all, my life is still pretty awesome, but I like to complain about it anyway. I guess I’m just getting a little tired of life in a place where cultural activities are sparse, and  the only thing to do after 7:30pm is drink at the same bars with the same people. I want to move and to be moved. Part of me expects these things to happen on their own, but it has become painfully clear that I’m the one responsible for making things happen.

Since I started writing this at 5pm and decided to pick up where I left off nearly 10 hours later, I’m gonna go ahead and say this is an appropriate time to put the pen to rest my computer away and go to sleep. It’s been real. It’s been fun. But has it been real fun? I hope everyone had a wonderful 11/11/11 at 11:11! May all your wishes come true. At least the good ones.

Peace&Blessings

If we ever meat again…

So. It finally happened. This past Sunday, after exactly 4 years of vegetarianism, I ate meat. When I decided to come to France for an entire year, I figured it would be inevitable since regional cuisine is heavily meat based. I knew sooner or later I would be asked to try a meaty French delicacy, or invited to dine at someone’s house where the main dish wouldn’t consist of vegetables or tofu. Not wanting to be rude or a pain in the ass, I vowed that I would suck it up and eat whatever was served (somewhat similar to my friend Liz’s new found eating habits). Also, the only thing that bothers me more than eating meat is wasting it. If time, money, effort and most importantly environmental resources have been put into the product, it should be consumed. So. All summer long, I kept telling myself that I should prepare myself by reintroducing meat to my body so that I could avoid stressing out my stomach over seas, but I was never able to bring myself to do it. No need to run ahead, I thought, I’ll wait and cross that bridge when I happen upon it.

I’ve been able to uphold my ethical and environmental values for almost an entire month in this meat loving culture thanks to two reasons: 1) Most of my food has been self-prepared up to this point, so no worries there. 2) Living so close to the coast almost always ensures that there will be some sort of fish served at any given restaurant. Again, no problemo.

Sunday was a different case. One of the English teachers at the lycée, Agnès, invited Phelecia and me to her house for lunch and an afternoon on the coast. She is literally one of the nicest people I have ever met, and I was thrilled to have a chance to hang out with her and her family. The invitation was presented to Phelecia and later passed along to me, which left me with no real opportunity to mention that I’m a vegetarian. Oh well, I thought, and just hoped for the best. My wishful thinking mostly paid off. Most of the meal was meat-free, with the exception of the main dish – a ham and cheese quiche. Vegetarian, no, but definitely better than being served a steak or foie gras.

Later that night, I kind of felt like my stomach was going to explode. Like, seriously explode. I of course assumed it was due to the ham, but looking back on things, two other factors probably contributed to my indigestion:

First of all, I ate way more food than I normally would because “traditional” French meals are served in series of courses. It is drawn out over a few hours, so you never realize what you’ve consumed until after the damage is done. You begin with apéro which consists of booze and finger foods. Since you aren’t given an actual “serving,” you just keep nibbling on salty snacks and veggies until every one is done with their drink. Then comes the main dish, which is typically rich and savory and served with at least two glasses of wine. This is followed by salad, to help with digestion, only to be succeeded by an elaborate cheese and bread tray. Even though you think you couldn’t possibly stretch your stomach any further, there is usually desert and coffee  that are difficult to turn down. So you give in. You take the plunge and profit, because after all, you’re in France. I still can’t figure out how everyone here doesn’t weigh 5082340 pounds with these eating habits. Unbelievable.

Factor two: motion sickness. After the elaborate meal, we all took a little trip to the nearby town of Binic to take a stroll along the coast. Obviously a beautiful thing, but some of the beauty is lost when you have to get there in a stick-shift via roller-coaster roads and excessive roundabouts. I’m not typically one to get motion sickness, but there is just something about sitting shotgun in French cars that makes me wanna VOM. Shift JERK shift smooth JERK shift smooth shift shift jerk JERK vomtown! Hopefully I’ll get used to it? If not, I’m content with walking and using public transit.

So whether it was the meat, the overeating, the motion sickness, or a combination of all three that made me feel so awful, I can’t be sure. But. Meat will continue to be consumed only on an as-needed basis.

Aside from the meat-mishap, life has been rather average, but generally good. My schedule is pretty baller. As I mentioned to many of you before, I only work 12 hours a week. To make things even better, my hours have been moved around so that I only work Monday, Tuesday, and Friday, which means Wednesday and Thursday are like a second weekend every week! SO good.

I’ve also been feeling more and more comfortable teaching with each class, and actually got some really good feedback today. One of the teachers I’m working with told me that her students were really excited when they came back from their session with me, and that they felt like they actually learned something! Say what?! Success! Hoping things will continue on this positive slope. I’m also JAZZED that I will sooooooon have met with all of my groups at least once. This means I will finally be able stop introducing myself – praise be! I cannot tell you how sick I am of repeating my name, talking about Minnesota weather, and answering questions like, “Why do you come in France?” (that’s what she said?), “What is sello (cello)?” and, “Do you have a girlfriend?” (ha). Only a couple more groups to meet!

Well, that’s about it for now mes amis! Until next time, bisous! xoxoxoxo

Ready or not

As a twenty-two year old liberal arts graduate spending a year teaching abroad in France, of all places, a blog seems practically obligatory in this day and age. All the cool kids are doing it. I’m quite the twenty-first century cliché, I know. While I don’t expect anyone other than my mother to read this on a regular basis, a blog seems like a good way to cope with the current transitions in my life, organize my thoughts, and stay connected with those far away. If nothing else, it will exist as a souvenir to aid my less than perfect memory in recalling this time away.

My optimistic side hopes that I will have hilarious anecdotes and beautiful, serendipitous moments to share with everyone, while my cynical side worries that I will have to rely on my creative writing skills to come up with interesting falsehoods to keep you all reading. Reality may find me somewhere in between the two, forcing myself to shade real life events with more colorful details. We’ll see. My inner student sadistically mourns the loss of writing assignments, so blogging will also act as a friendly replacement for research papers and rédactions. I am doubtful that the things I write about will amount to the side-splitting hilarity of Lindsay Berg’s From Russia With Love, or the thoughtful insight of Clara’s Second Set of Baby Steps, but I do anticipate having things worth writing about! If not, I can always post a pretty picture to make up for it.

But enough about blogging. The more important thing here… I’M MOVING TO FRANCE! It has taken awhile to really set in thanks to the emotional rollercoaster of graduation, the move back home for the summer, a rather unfortunate job as a barista at a highly unsuccessful café in the ‘burbs, and some fun summer activities with friends to distract me. With the move creeping up so quickly, however, it is finally starting to hit me: I’m not packing the van and heading back to St. Olaf. I’m packing my suitcase and flying to France. This last summer has definitely had its highs and lows, and I’m feeling quite ready for it to be over. Peace out America, I’m heading to Franceland. Exchanging the red, white, and blue for the bleu, blanc, et rouge, trading out cold weather beanies for fashion-forward berets, and bracing myself for an abundance of cheese and wine. Though the two teeter back and forth constantly on a not so stable scale, excitement is outweighing anxiety at this point. In spite of the myriad of stresses of moving and my never-ending to-do list, life seems pretty great right now.

La vie en France seems like such a romantic idea, and having been there before, I’m well aware of its beauty and charm. There are countless things about Minnesota that will be dearly missed such as my family, friends, pets, and brown sugar to mention a few, but I am pumped beyond belief for what awaits overseas! While I was originally hoping for my teaching assignment to be in a larger city like Rennes, Lyon or Paris, I have fully embraced the idea of life in a smaller French town. I anticipate my life in Saint-Brieuc to be something like this:

Not really. But kind of. One can hope, right? Won’t know until I get there, I suppose. I would surely appreciate this kind of provincial life more than Belle ever did. With a population of approximately 46,000 (more than double that of Northfield!) it probably won’t be the quant village life of Belle I’m imagining, but it still seems quite charming. In all seriousness, though, as long as there is a boulangerie nearby with fresh baguettes, coastal views, and people to speak French with, I will be more than happy.

Time to return to the aforementioned to-do list. Next up: Garage sale.

Grosses bises (xoxo)