How Stephen Got His Groove Back

Well shit. Looks like another month has come and gone without much notice, and without much commentary on my behalf. I’d like to say that I barely wrote anything during the second half of January because I was out and about, busy beyond belief without a second to spare and never on the internet, but that would be a blatant lie. The truth is quite the opposite to be perfectly honest. As I mentioned before, I had gotten myself into a bit of a mid-year slump after the holidays, and though I tried to pull myself out of it as quickly as possible, these things take some time. Cooking and baking and blogging have all been helpful tools, but being stuck in Saint-Brieuc for the the entire month of January was a bit of a road block. When I wasn’t preoccupied with the oven, I found myself in my room watching things like Downton Abbey (which, by the way, is an amazing show that I highly recommend watching if you haven’t yet) and eating more than my fair share of desserts. I was far from being clinically depressed, but was still highly unmotivated thanks to a bout cold weather, the unglamorous ‘city’ of Saint-Brieuc, and an ever impending sense of doom looming over my undecided future. Dramatic much? Oui.

Luckily, February has thus far been a breath of fresh air and the rest of the month is full of promise. Out of nowhere, there seems to be so much to do and see! Being too busy to write has become a legitimate excuse over the past week, and the fun of February isn’t even half over! With a road trip to Normandy and a pseudo-weekend in Rennes already under my belt, I still have a week long trip to Picardie followed by an Italian tour to look forward to! My mind has been a little all over the place lately trying to keep the travel plans straight for all four of these trips, but it’s kept me busy and anxious in an excited way. Places to go! People to see! Much better than brooding in my bed. Who ever would’ve thought February could be so grand?

As I headed out to Normandy this past weekend in a nine person “mini-bus” with my Franco-American crew, I couldn’t help but recall another voyage made not so long ago. Last January during interim break, I headed South with my friends Sarah, Clara, Ann, and Laurel for an Arkansan adventure that I’ll never forget. The week we spent in Conway was by far one of the most hilarious and enjoyable times of my conscious life, both extremely exciting and incredibly relaxing. Being in warm weather, going on mountainous walks, singing show tunes at the dinner table, drinking $1.99 margarita’s at JJ’s, giving into/falling in love with country music, cave diving, curling up on couches, learning about places like Pickle’s Gap and Toad Suck, baking buttloads of cookies and decorating a staggering number of Valentine’s Day cards made for a welcome recess from freezing/studying our asses off at Olaf. Breaking routine, visiting somewhere new, and being surrounded by wonderful people gave everything a new light. There was a sense of comfort and openness with my friends after being together day and night for the entirety of break. It’s so easy to get caught up in the stresses of life, but weeks like that help you notice how happy things can be when you let go and have some uninhibited fun. #clichécentralbutwhateveritstrue #ewijustusedahashtag

The beginning of something beautiful

happy beings behind falsely angry façades

hot potatoes make the world go round and cause awkward photographic reactions

The MOST Valentine's Arkansas has ever seen

The weekend at my friend Leslie’s in Normandy essentially served the same revitalizing purpose as the week in Arkansas but in a much more urgently-needed and heightened sense. Getting the heck out of St-B. and letting things loose in the country shook things up and made me giddy. Making homemade pizza in a giant brick oven, sipping on cidre and wine, cuddling with an adorable dog, seeing the tragically beautiful beaches of Normandy, visiting the epic tapestry of Bayeux, gathering around a raclette, wandering around the countryside, playing charades and trivial pursuit, watching the Superbowl (for the sake of Madonna), getting snowed-in and missing a full day of work (snow days do still exist!), and marveling at Le Mont Saint-Michel made for a memorable weekend that has given me a firm shove out of my previous slump status. My life is nuts, in a good way. I’m sending out a MILLION thanks to Leslie and Allie for making this weekend happen! You two are the bomb.

Kate presenting Leslie's cozy little home

HOMEMADE PIZZA

Raclette Dinner chez Leslie

Le Mont St-Michel

Even though the characters and settings of my life continue to change, there are certain things that remain true:

• traveling with someone is one of the best ways to really get to know them
• cold weather is relative
• snow days are always the best days
• road trips are always the best trips
• food brings people together, namely potatoes
• charades requires more skill than you think
• sleeping between two people is starts out as a wonderful idea until you become a fiery hot mess
• 90s jams alway make the perfect car ride soundtrack

My upgraded emotional status stuck with me throughout this week as more classes were canceled (making this a four-day-work-MONTH) and as I headed to Rennes on Tuesday afternoon for a mid-week weekend. Our last-minute-guest-conductor-turned-new-found-friend from last year’s orchestra tour, Tito Munoz, was in town directing Bejamin Britten’s opera,  The Turn of the Screw. I got to see the show with my resident Rennes friends (Mary Claire, Berit, and most recently relocated Steph!), and got a chance to hang out/catch up with Tito after the show which was great! Talking about last year’s tour made me freshly miss orchestra, but there was a welcomed sense of nostalgia and plenty of other things to talk about to keep us from focusing too heavily on the past. My days off gave me plenty of time to get in some good one-on-one time with Steph and Berit as well, nicely rounding off my time in Rennes.

So that’s more or less where my life is at. There’s still plenty to worry about (and a mouthful of canker sores to prove it), with my sister out of commission thanks to her gallbladder, open-ended travel plans, unplanned lessons to teach, and my future continuing to be 100% uncertain, but present life is pretty good with trips on either side of me. My chin is up, and I’m ready for more fun. Come and join my party! Catch ya on the other side of Italy!

Bisous bisous xoxo

Mid-Winter Slump

For the past week or so, I’ve been wanting to add a new post to keep up with a resolution to write more. The problem is, nothing blog worthy has really happened as of late, leaving me with a lack of words, and a longing for something to happen. I’ve been hesitant to write, worrying that anything would be dull in comparison to my Austrian adventures. Seems likely that this may well be the case. But in recent days, I’ve come to terms with this humdrum reality and thought I would take this chance to be honest with myself about my state of being by being honest will all of you. I’m constantly inspired by the unabashed sincerity in my dear friend Clara’s blog, and I feel like it’s time to open up and take a little break from my sugar coated tales of European life.

You see, I’ve hit a bit of a mid-winter slump. The term “mid-winter” seems somewhat inappropriate since the temperature hasn’t been below 45° F all week, but it is mid-January after all. I guess it’s more of a mid-year slump, really. So I present you with a series of whiney unreasonable complaints causes for said slumpiness:

The holidays are over, and the lights have been taken down leaving the streets of Saint-Brieuc drab and lifeless. The infamous French “soldes” (January sales) have begun, which would normally be cause for celebration, but I’m broke from my extravagant Christmas which makes the sales depressing instead of joyous. I work less in a month than most people work in a week, but the few hours that I’m actually teaching tend to be supplemented by many more hours of stress outside of school spent worrying over lesson plans and how my kids will be behave. I want to bake, but I stop myself out of fear of gaining more butter weight. Lord knows I already consume more than a reasonable number of calories in wine and beer since the other assistants and I lack originality in our methods of entertainment. I have intentions of being productive with my excessive free time, but the rainy weather blurs the days together and tires me out so that the only “productive” things I end up doing are finishing seasons of T.V. shows, eating, and putting my dirty clothes in the hamper (but not actually washing them). And while I’ve met wonderful people here, it still doesn’t make up for the fact that I miss everyone stateside. It also doesn’t excuse the fact that I’ve been pretty damn awful at keeping in touch with many of you, another resolution that  needs resolving.

I do indeed love France, but its charm has faded a bit, and the novelty of being here has begun to dissipate. I by no means want to idly wish away the rest of my time here, but rather I want to find ways to profit from the quickly disappearing months that still rest. I want to find a presence in this present, thanks again to Clara. When my visa runs out in six months, I want to look back at my time here knowing that I didn’t waste it. I’ve already had some life changing experiences, and I want them to keep on coming. This slump needs to end, and I need to get back to living and experiencing things with fresh and excited eyes.

One of the biggest obstacles that’s been keeping me from being alive in the present is my lack of foresight. One of my most important New Year’s resolutions was to figure out what I’ll be doing when teaching is up, but I’ve yet to bring this goal to fruition. I don’t intend to figure out a life plan or anything, but it would put my mind at ease if I at least figured out the next step. When I started work, the end of my contract seemed so far ahead that I didn’t dare think about my next move. Truth is, April 30th is approaching faster than I’d care to admit to myself. Renewing my teaching contract is a tempting option, but I’ve been trying to weigh out the pros and cons of this theoretical situation. On the plus side, I’d love to stay here, I could keep working on my French, the hours are great, the pay is decent considering the workload, I wouldn’t have to look for work elsewhere, and I could keep traveling. On the other hand, I would have to wait until May or later to find out if there’s a position for me, I would probably have to find some crap job to fill the three or four month gap between teaching contracts, I could be placed in a shitty school in a tiny town, I hate how stressed out I get about teaching, I miss my friends and family, and I would more or less just be putting off finding an actual job and/or continuing my education… Hmm. Decisions. I’m not the best at them. I guess I need to figure out what some other possible options before I decide anything, though. Let me know if you’ve got any thoughts, dear readers!

Well it’s getting late here in Franceland, and I have to get up before the sun tomorrow… Bed time for me!

Bisous